(BOOK) 힙합하다: RAP MONSTER (Part 3)
If you ask what hip
hop means to me, now I can say it. Something I like, one of the things I like, "one of them" and "my favorite." It's no more and no less
than that. in regards to this, if you say that I have no knowledge of or respect for the culture, I can't do anything about that; this is the best that I can do. There are many things that I like. music is first, and after that is clothing, travel, and books. There are these four things that I like, and ahead of all of those is hip hop. I really like clothing. If I go broke in the future I think it'll be because of clothes. (laugh) I buy a lot. and for some reason the genre that I like is a mania genre called 'dark wear' so the clothes are incredibly expensive. I'm the type who invests a lot into clothing because I'll wear them for a long time and because I think they're a simple method of self-expression. I can't go shopping often, which I regret. I can't travel far away, so I mainly travel by myself to nearby places, I go to Nami Island or Jungdongjin, or to Chuncheon. I go by myself to gather my thoughts and receive inspiration.
This could be
arrogant, or a delusion, but I try to talk to the fans about music that I like
or rappers that I like. It isn't that I'm asking for understanding; rather,
it's because there are a number of people who have said that they started
listening to hip hop because of me. It's not because I made an effort, but just
that the fans naturally became interested in hip hop or rappers and so they end
up going to other artists' concerts. I think of this as one way that I can
contribute to this culture or method. I'm cautious to say this, but at any rate
there are many fans who listen to hip hop, who listen to rap because of me…
clearly, there are people who are becoming interested in this culture, whether
in directly or in a more roundabout way. Even if they think about that part
once, I'm thankful for it. I really like Korean hip hop. Garion, Verbal Jint,
P-Type, Soul Company, Supreme Team… I came up by watching all these cool
hyungs, and I receive limitless influence from them.
These days I've been
thinking about various things on my own, and I think that I've come to better
understand other people, the thoughts of other people and their anxieties. Since that's on my mind, I think a lot and I want to talk a lot. It's really
ironic. Hip hop isn't that kind of thing. Actually, when I did this interview I
hesitated on whether I had to do it. It's true that I started just because I
liked hip hop. But if you ask whether 'hip hop' and 'idol' can co-exist, a long
debate always ensues. I like hip hop, I love hip hop, but I feel that contained
in the thesis "I am hip hop, I do hip hop" are countless histories
and things unseen. It's still difficult. I think that instead, I can just say,
"I like music, I love hip hop, and I do rap."
I tried imagining
myself 5 or 10 years from now, but 5 years ago I was a trainee, and 10 years
ago I was just beginning to listen to hip hop. It's a big starting point, and
the me I imagined then has almost nothing in common with the me of now. So
after I tried to continue my image making for some time, I finally realized
that there's no real meaning to it. I have a vague schema, but I don't want to
be tied to that and would rather live while focusing on the present. I hope now
that I can have a little more conviction towards myself, and that I can become
a person who can give a slightly more positive influence. As time passes I feel
more and more like I'm losing my self-conviction, so I hope that in the future
I can have more conviction toward myself. As my field of vision widens, I
suffer from a kind of identity crisis about the me I thought I knew. So 5 years from now, or 10 years from now, I hope that I can become a person
whose confidence in myself is clear and unwavering.
Recently I read
"The Stranger," and one of the things Albert Camus said is, "the
best art is art that speaks little. Leave a space and let people fill the space
themselves; that is good art." I really agreed with these words. Rap is
something that has a feeling of telling one's own story in a very detailed way,
but after being involved in this for a long time, I've also come to have a
different perspective. It isn't "I'm going to change the world! through my
story I'm going to convey hope and dreams to people!" but rather, it's
enough if people hear a song and it leaves some kind of impression on them. If
I'm able to leave a mark on someone's life, even if for a moment, then hasn't
that in itself already fulfilled the function of music?
Even if the culture and
emotion are respectively different, there's nonetheless something that can
pierce the time period. I think that the people who live in any one generation
have emotions that they can share. So if we talk about these things, then in one way or
another people will embrace it. If I talk about my deficiencies and hopes, then
others will accept it in their own way. I don't feel that there's a need to
create a boundary of necessarily needing to convey a certain message. What I
liked about Camus' words was the idea that there are many stories contained
within those connotative figures of speech and metaphors. I have things to
think about in the future, so it seems like rather than trying to pack in all
my stories to convey them, on the contrary I want to work to remove my stories
instead. In the future, I'm going to try say things without prolixity, but
rather concisely. I thought when I wrote lyrics that I would
write 16 words and then choose more, but rather than that, if I have this much,
then I'm reducing it little by little.
I have a lot of things I want to do. So these days I'm
even singing. (laugh) It's not a joke, but I even sometimes regret that my name
is Rap Monster. If I'd read Camus' book a little earlier, I might not have even
ended up as Rap Monster. (laugh) So these days I'm writing it mostly as 'Rap
Mon' or 'RM.' Really, in the future I might end up changing my name to this.
(laugh) If the time comes to change it, you can think of it as me having followed
through on the resolution I'm making now. (laugh) It would be nice if 5 or 10
years from now, people could see me and think, "he really did want to do
many things, and he did well in his own way." Although it's all mixed
together, it's not pig slop but rather delicious budae jjigae.* I have a lot of
greed,** so I'm not the type who can clearly say that I'm going to do just this
one thing. But I don't know. That could become a curse or could become any
number of things, but among those it seems like I'll have to find my own method
of achieving equilibrium. I'm practicing to find that method. I want to polish
it and refine it and show you only the substance of a diamond.
date 2016.3.18
location Seoul Nonhyeon-dong Big Hit Entertainment office
* 'army stew,' traditionally made by mixing noodles,
spicy sauce, and whatever leftovers could be found from US army bases in Korea.
** greed is not a bad thing, just a lot of desire
towards a certain goal or subject.
20 comments
He's already a diamond. I wish he could see that.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if that was purposeful, but Namjoon came full circle with the diamond.
ReplyDeleteThis is such an enlightening and interesting read. Interviews like these are the reason why I stan Namjoon. Thank you so much for translating it!
ReplyDeleteThank you for translating this very interesting interview and putting it on your blog for everyone to read without restriction - unlike others who took your work freely (event it's with your permission) and then restricted it on some community site or whatever... !!
ReplyDeleteHave a nice week :)
i really cried while reading this, its 2018 and this is still a gold. i hope he already know that he's so precious and the most treasure of me also he deserve the world))); btw thanks for translated this this really mean so much to me. i purple you x
ReplyDeleteMarch 2020,.....and still a so enlightening read!!!.... I'm so grateful for your hard work and generous sharing!!!.... Thanks a lot... His way with words and thoughts always move my heart in a heartwarming way.
ReplyDeletehe suceeded =)
ReplyDeleteThank you for translating this! I became an ARMY in April 2019 so I had no idea that this existed. It ws so nice and interesting to read this and it made me love and respect Namjoon even more. He's such a beautiful person!
ReplyDeleteHe got his wish. He has acheived so much and I'm so proud.
ReplyDeletei really love this man. not due to his handsomenes and popularity aside but as a person he is. ginuine and inteligent and being true to himself.he is such an inspiration to alot of people.spreading positivity in various ways and influencing individuals to be better in life and persue what they aspire to be and working on it actively. im lucky i was born in his era.
ReplyDeleteI love the mindset and lifestyle of improving oneself. I just hope that Namjoon has enough time to just exist. Namjoon is inspirational as he is, without needing extraordinary acts. I hope he knows he is loved by many. And that he truly do things well in his own way.
ReplyDeleteWhile reading this, I don't know if its because of the translator or I haven't read enough autobiographies, but it seems as though Rap Monster (Namjoon) is really incredibly articulate. He is such a smart guy, while reading this I kept thinking about all his controversies. I kept thinking about how he kept bringing up, "the culture", because it relates to me but in the end all I could really think about is how he is so focused and understanding of music, the way he accepts that people WILL indeed have their own ideas and their own opinions on music. That he alone can impact by doing so little, such has starting someone listening to hip hop and contributing to the "culture". I have written this as going all over the place but I do hope whoever is reading this can understand what I mean. And for the translator, thank you so much, I feel like I got to know a lot more of how Kim Namjoon thinks.
ReplyDeleteMaybe on March 3, 2021, 5 YEARS (as he so often mentions) we can ask him,
"Hey RM, do you have a little more conviction of yourself, do you feel you have given positive influences? As your field of vision widens, are you now suffering from a kind of identity crisis about the you you thought you knew? So 5 years ago, you had hoped that you could become a person whose confidence in yourself was clear and unwavering. Is that true today?"
Namjoon, how are you so wonderful? He's the epitome of someone to look up to and the way his mind works is just... wow. His determination, humbleness, intelligence, understanding is so inspiring to see. I hope he is able to see himself the way we do, or is more content with how beautiful of a human he is. Thank you for translating his biography OP!
ReplyDeleteRead this in 2021 is another vibe
ReplyDeleteJuly2021- thank you for translating, He is very matured for 21yrs old, one day I want to read his biography or just any Piece that is about him written by himself just like this one, I hope you found the equilibrium in yourself RM. Love you
ReplyDeleteNamjoon love, you did it. ����
ReplyDeleteReading this when he is a leader of a group that's become the only Asian artist to be nominated as Artist Of The Year at AMAs, you've made it RM, and it's only November 2021.
ReplyDeleteits 2022 and BTS is going to attend grammys tomorrow, not just that but they are nominated with the song that Namjoon had a hand in making. proud is an understatement.
ReplyDeleteRM,aka Rap Monster,proves himself and he means what he said...a real hero bringing big dreams come true! Bravo~ (love from Taiwan)
ReplyDelete2023年了,他帶領的BTS仍然是國際歌壇的龍頭代表~即使成員已經在一一入伍的狀態中,而他本人更是鑽石中的鑽石,獲得各界稱讚及效法!
ReplyDelete